We all have those moments where we think, “I could never do that.” Whether it’s homeschooling your kids, changing your diet, or transforming your mindset, the phrase “I could never” often feels like an immovable barrier. For years, I let that mindset hold me back. But when I started challenging those thoughts, I realized how much more I’m capable of achieving. Here are a few ways I’ve overcome my “I could never” mindset and how it’s changed my life.
Homeschooling My Kids
When my oldest son, Joseph, went to kindergarten, I was nervous. At the time, we didn’t know he was autistic, but I always had a sense that traditional school might not be the best fit for him. He didn’t mind school, but he rarely talked about it, even when I prompted him. His teacher’s comments echoed what I used to hear about myself: “He’s so smart and sweet, but he’s quiet.” Ah, yes. The “quiet” badge—so familiar.
Joseph’s behavior started regressing as the year went on, and school felt more like a chore than a place to grow. We took more mental health days, and I kept circling the idea of homeschooling. But the doubts were loud: Could I really do it? Was I patient enough, organized enough, knowledgeable enough?
After a safety incident where Joseph managed to leave the school unattended, I realized traditional schooling wasn’t the right fit. That moment forced me to face my doubts about homeschooling head-on. It wasn’t about whether I could do it anymore—it was about why I had to.
My husband encouraged me to take the leap, and I’m so glad I did. I mean, who needs a traditional school system when you can create your own chaos at home, right? Now, after two years of homeschooling, it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I’m confident teaching both my boys, and I love the extra time we get together. Sure, we get on each other’s nerves being together 24/7, but I’d rather have too many moments together than not enough.
Changing My Diet
For years, I didn’t think much about what I put into my body. I assumed I could never be the person who orders a salad instead of pasta. It just wasn’t something I’d ever do. But when I discovered I was lactose and gluten intolerant, I had no choice but to change. I shared more about this in a recent post, but, short version, at first, it felt impossible, like giving up comfort itself. But as I adjusted, I noticed something unexpected—I felt better. Not just physically, but emotionally, too. That small change cracked open the door to something bigger, learning to care for myself, not out of self-judgment, but self-respect.
Since then, I’ve been refining my diet even further, focusing on foods that nourish my body and support my health. Along the way, I’ve lost almost 90 pounds and feel so much healthier. It wasn’t an overnight transformation. Turns out, lasting change doesn’t show up after one salad. But with small, manageable steps, I proved to myself that I’m capable of real progress. And now, I actually like eating vegetables. Weird, I know. I’ve officially crossed over to the world of “I could never” becomes “I actually did it.”
Becoming Confident in Myself
Perhaps the biggest “I could never” I’ve overcome is believing I could be confident and happy with who I am. For years, I felt trapped in self-doubt and insecurity. I compared myself to others, assumed I wasn’t enough, and put up walls to protect myself from rejection. It was like I had made a career out of not feeling good enough. But through mindfulness, self-reflection, and a willingness to challenge my own beliefs, I’ve come to see myself in a new light.
Letting go of the “I could never” mindset has been transformative. It’s allowed me to embrace opportunities, push past fear, and grow into the person I’ve always wanted to be. Now when I hear that old voice whisper, “You can’t do this,” I just roll my eyes and move forward. If you’re stuck in the “I could never” mindset, I encourage you to ask yourself: What if you could? Start small, take one step at a time, and remember that change is possible if you’re willing to try.
Breaking Free from Limits
At the end of the day, the things I thought I could never do turned out to be the very things that helped me grow the most. I just had to stop letting “I could never” be my default setting and give myself permission to try. Doubt still shows up sometimes, but I’m learning to see it for what it is—just an old story that doesn’t really fit anymore.
So, here’s to all the things we thought we could never do. Turns out, we can. And if we stumble along the way, that’s just part of it. At least we’re moving.
What’s one “I could never” moment you’re ready to tackle? It doesn’t have to be life-changing—maybe it’s as simple as striking up a conversation with someone new, signing up for that class you’ve been eyeing, or even just going for a walk when you’d rather not. What’s the first small step you can take today to push past it? Share in the comments—I’d love to hear your thoughts. Let’s remind ourselves (and each other) that we’re more capable than we think.
With love & light,
Jessica ♡
Unraveling the Self 
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